The famous community spirit of Moseley Village, thought by many to be under threat for some time, is to be given a boost under recent innovations proposal by Moseley Forum.
In response to the unwelcome tide of scruffy, pub-going, non-Moseleyites, the forum is considering the introducion of a local I.D. system. Residents of the area will wear jumpers with key pieces of personal information emblazoned on the front. This information will consist of their length of residency in the village and their annual income.
This will entitle the proper residents of the area to priviliged access to Nima’s, Pottery & Pieces and the other more civilised establishments. It will also entitle them to move children off the swings, stop non-residents stealing sunshine from the park and also kick tramps to death.
Eye on Moseley can’t wait. A two tier social system to be proud of.