{"id":29,"date":"2005-08-04T18:11:00","date_gmt":"2005-08-04T18:11:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/trite101.wordpress.com\/2005\/08\/04\/run-for-your-lives-its-the-mayor\/"},"modified":"2005-08-04T18:11:00","modified_gmt":"2005-08-04T18:11:00","slug":"run-for-your-lives-its-the-mayor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/?p=29","title":{"rendered":"Run For Your Lives. It’s The Mayor"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\nThe Moseley Conference was recently disturbed by the shock arrival of Birmingham’s Mayor. He was said to be visiting Moseley to “sort things out”. There has been deep unrest within the Mayrol appartments for some time, mainly concerning Moseley’s attempts to take control of it’s own destiny.<\/p>\n

The Mayor backed up by his “enforcer” Councillor Knot proceeded to take control of the Conference and impose some much needed order on Moseley’s civic affairs. In a macabre display of power the Mayor dragged notable Moseley citizens on to a prepared stage and made them perform humiliating displays of servitude. One community leader was reduced to tears after being forced to bark like a dog and walk on their hands like a deformed human wheelbarrow.<\/p>\n

The Mayor then made a stirring speech filled with platitudes about “community life”, “harmony” and “togetherness” the sub text was there for everyone to read.<\/p>\n

The Mayor was said to be driven by a desire to get Birmingham “ticking over” before he released his hold on power and Theresa “The Stiletto” Stewart ascended to the Mayrol throne.<\/p>\n

In related news Theresa Stewart became the new Lord Mayor of Birmingham and held a massive party in Cannon Hill park. In a speech to the gathered masses the new Mayor voiced a desire to model her Mayorship on fictional comic book character Judge Dredd. This shock relvelation produced bemusement and a few quickly stifled giggles from local residents. A range of T shirts featuring the head of the new mayor and the logo “I am the law” will soon be available in most shops in the Birmingham area.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Moseley Conference was recently disturbed by the shock arrival of Birmingham’s Mayor. He was said to be visiting Moseley to “sort things out”. There has been deep unrest within the Mayrol appartments for some time, mainly concerning Moseley’s attempts to take control of it’s own destiny. The Mayor backed up by his “enforcer” Councillor […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[20,125],"class_list":["post-29","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-story","tag-bryan-nott","tag-theresa-stewart"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2okCM-t","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=29"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=29"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=29"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=29"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}