{"id":157,"date":"2005-08-04T21:33:00","date_gmt":"2005-08-04T21:33:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/trite101.wordpress.com\/2005\/08\/04\/moseley-a-%e2%80%9cbig-player%e2%80%9d-in-annual-surly-help-awards\/"},"modified":"2005-08-04T21:33:00","modified_gmt":"2005-08-04T21:33:00","slug":"moseley-a-big-player-in-annual-surly-help-awards","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/?p=157","title":{"rendered":"Moseley a \u201cBig Player\u201d in Annual Surly Help Awards"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>
\nIt\u2019s become something of a regular occurrence and this year is no exception. Once again \u201cThe Big Mo\u201d is featured heavily in the nominations for The Annual Surly Help Awards. Local nominations include:-<\/p>\n

The \u201cmanager\u201d at the Goose for his hilariously hostile attitude to his customers;<\/p>\n

The baffling security guard in Boots for his welcoming way of standing six inches away from anybody under sixty not dressed in a suit and staring accusingly;<\/p>\n

The ginger haired counter-plebe in Lloyds Bank who treats you like you\u2019ve stolen the money you withdraw. From his mom.<\/p>\n

In a truly \u201cEddie the Eagle Edwards\u201d style move Mr Sai, possibly the least hostile person ever born, announced that he would have a go at securing a nomination for next year\u2019s awards but conceded that \u201cI don\u2019t really do surly very well, my friend please? Would you like a free thing?\u201d<\/p>\n

The prestigious award, presented by the British Federation of Customer Service Experts has rarely been so hotly contended and our local hopefuls will this year be going up against some stiff competition including an international bid from Slobodan Milosevic. Let us not forget the strong bid from three-times joint champions Jan and Ronnie who, though no longer within the Moseley borders, are still happily stifling the character of local boozers in Kings Heath, where drinking is said to have become \u201clargely depressing\u201d. Following superbly mule-headed, obstructive performances in past years the odd couple are still hot favourites.<\/p>\n

Hopes for the locals are high though, following allegedly leaked conversations amongst the judges concerning their \u201camazement\u201d at how \u201coutrageously wrong\u201d the \u201ctwat\u201d in the Goose \u201cis\u201d and how Moseley might soon need its own \u201cspecial section\u201d. A spokespersonage-of-non-specific-genderisation said today \u201cwe can neither confirm nor deny these rumours but fuck me, your shops are full of wankers\u201d.
\nRest assured that our scouts will keep a close \u201ceye\u201d on the ceremony if it can be arsed.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s become something of a regular occurrence and this year is no exception. Once again \u201cThe Big Mo\u201d is featured heavily in the nominations for The Annual Surly Help Awards. Local nominations include:- The \u201cmanager\u201d at the Goose for his hilariously hostile attitude to his customers; The baffling security guard in Boots for his welcoming […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[7],"tags":[85],"class_list":["post-157","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-story","tag-mr-sai-news"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2okCM-2x","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=157"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=157"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=157"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.eyeonmoseley.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=157"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}