It is now sixty four days since a party of Accountants were nailed into the Lime and Chilli House and Police are becoming increasingly concerned for their well being. This cruel act was apparently perpetrated by a large gang of kids in yet another example of Big Brother related crime.

The Accountants were apparently enjoying the ambience when boards were placed over the windows sealing them in their very own death tomb. This senselesss act has brought mild criticism from many within a community. A passerby said to us yesterday “Why can’t they just go out of the backdoor?”

In an attempt to bring some sort of meaning to this random incarceration we challenged the police on their perceived inaction. They told us “I blame the parents really. They let them watch these so called reality TV programs and it’s sort of obvious they’re going to go and copy them isn’t it? At the end of the day though we just thank the Lord the place is licensed. Can you imagine the carnage? At present we are just waiting to get hold of a local artisan with a claw hammer or maybe a crowbar.”

Although unusual this event is not without precedent. In the late nineties a bunch those sort of new age types were sealed into the old Zen. The tales of cannibalism still bring cold sweats to many of the vegetarians of Moseley.

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